Regret

i look back and remember the possibility of a different decision. in my memory the possibility was a certainty. but at the time, which i can also remember, i felt "stuck" in a certain frame of mind. this mind frame almost guaranteed the wrong choice. how can i avoid the mindset of inevitable failure?

diligence in awareness seems to be the issue. right now, as i type, i am aware of my surroundings and feelings. i am aware of the choice: to type, or not to type. i am aware of the consequence: expression, or non expression. lower case or upper case-understanding of "poetic license," or no understanding. these choices are not life or death.

but i remember a driving accident i had. the choice: to stop or not to stop. i know this choice now, but i did not know it then.

why?

i was not told of this option. i was not aware of the right decision.

It is written, "Be self-controlled, be watchful (or alert), for your adversary, the devil, roams about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith..."

self-controlled
alert
aware

that day i was self-controlled, and relatively alert. but i was not aware of the necessary options.

awareness of options and possible danger, and consequences of the danger
Options: stop or go
Possible Consequences: if i stop, i will not hit a car. if i go, i may or may not.

"maybe you should have asked more questions," said someone who knew of the accident.

maybe so. but what if i don't even know the questions to ask. what if i don't know what i don't know? how then can i know?

i hate regret. more so, i hate the inevitable mindset.

if i were to teach a driving lesson, i would tell of the option.
the teacher should tell the student his or her options.

"i can't teach how to think. i can't teach you judgment," said my instructor.

if by this he meant he can't think or judge for me in a given situation, this is part true. it is true that he cannot literally use my brain for me, but he can think in my place in the sense of seeing what i don't see, and responding in a way i would not.

and he can definitely teach me how to think and how to judge. this is what teachers do all the time. they teach students to see a certain reality as they see it, having had experience, and they teach the student to think through that experience.

self-controlled
alert
aware

to speak or not to speak
speech=expression
silence=non expression

to express anger or not to express anger
expressed anger=possible argument
non expressed anger=possible time to calm down and think

but in the situation of angry expression, why does it feel like the option is not there?

i believe this is the enemy we are to watch for. i believe this is the deception: that there is no option.

mindset: a fixed mental disposition that predetermines one's interpretation of and response to situations.

i love this definition of mindset.

a fixed mental disposition

if i fix my mind on the options of words and actions, and decide based upon informed knowledge of consequences, so that i may choose the words, actions, AND CONSEQUENCES, perhaps there will be no more regrets.

if i predetermine my interpretation and responses to situations BEFORE situatons, then there should be no regrets in my future.

self-control
awareness

never allow myself to be pressured. be still and be silent instead of being pressured. perhaps it is better to remain silent and still than to speak and act too quickly, and thus regret my words and actions.

diligence
persistence

It is written, "Those who live in accordance with the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit."

those who live in agreement with God's Spirit have a fixed spiritual mental focus that predetermines a spiritual interpretation and response to situations.

or, those who live in accordance with truth have a fixed mental disposition of truth that predetermines a true interpretation and response to situations.

fixed
predetermined

slow things down when pressured to speak and act.
if a car horn blows behind me, instead of speeding off, purposely stop longer; purposely drive slower. when rushed, slow down.

in defensive tactics there is the concept of a "reactionary gap." this is the distance between the attacker and the one attacked. the one attacked should let there be a great enough distance for time to react. if there is no reactionary gap, the victim is in a danger zone.

time to think
a reactionary gap.

i must have a fixed mental disposition that refuses to rush decisions, and predetermines enough time for interpretations and responses.

it must start now............................................................................................................................................

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